December 3, 2012 - Hectic

Hectic

We all have hectic days. I get that. Doesn't mean we have to like it, but I'll take it today.
Mom and I went up to see dad this morning. He looked pretty darned good for an 88 year old man with cancer who has been in the hospital for 39 days, has had pneumonia twice, two chemo treatments, and nine radiation treatments! He is depressed ... Who wouldn't be! 
Dad got another change of scenery today. His doctor sent him from ICU into a room on the fifth floor. That's where he just came from, so he is fresh on the nurses minds. As soon as his nurse told me about the move I told mom I'd be right back. I went down to scout out empty rooms to see if I could find him a good one. Just as I got down there Brittney saw me and shouted out my name. I'm pretty sure she knew why I was down there even though nobody had told the nurses on 5E yet.
I noticed there was an empty corner room ... I asked if that would be dad's new room. They hadn't seen a request yet, so I went back upstairs and talked to his nurse. She put in the request. Shortly after that she got a call telling her she couldn't do that. So, another nurse called the woman who made that call and explained the situation ... over a month in the hospital ... chemo ... radiation ... the "Peanut Gallery" ... I'm certain that's what changed her mind!
So, his nurse started prepping him to go down for radiation. He wouldn't be back in that room, but instead would go directly into the new room on 5. Brittney was so excited to have him back that she already had his room ready for him including a big cup of ice chips. She knows daddy well! His nurse, Jenna, was also glad to see him. 
I'm sure nurses worry about their patients when they exit their care so quickly and are swept away to ICU as dad was late last week. I'm here to tell you under no uncertain terms ... There are several nurses and doctors who wear capes at Blount Memorial Hospital. I'm pretty sure some have halos and wings, too, because they are truly sent from God.
I don't know how we'd have gotten this far without them, and I'm forever grateful they are there caring for my precious daddy. 
Christy and I are more than ready to adopt several of these wonderful people, and by carefully reading our comments under photos, I'm guessing you'd figure out who they are ... but not all of them ... Yet. :)
These people have extremely hectic careers, but they are very good at what they do. They handle stress very well, and work amazingly under incredible pressure. Split second decisions can sometimes mean the difference in life or death, and I'm pretty sure a few of those decisions have successfully been made for dad during this journey.
Dad is in excellent hands. Dad is strong and he's definitely a fighter. I am worried that after I leave for California that he will worry about me and I know I will worry about him, and I certainly don't want to make matters worse. I know mom, Bill and especially Christy will take excellent care of dad, but they are all three already spread so thin, and here with the Christmas holidays just around the corner ... I just cannot even imagine how hectic the coming weeks will be for them!
I am planning on spending as much time as I can with daddy tomorrow. I have a few errands to run, plus I need to finish packing, but I will spend every second I can with him. My current plan is to stop by on Wednesday morning on the way to the airport, as well. I am NOT looking forward to having to leave, but I also know I cannot stay here forever. I have put my life on hold for five weeks, and I must go tend to matters that only I can. There will likely be no Christmas tree at our house this year. Few presents will be wrapped. Even fewer cookies will be baked, but I'd do it all again to be here for my dad.

December 3, 2012 - Nurses

Dad enjoyed a visit with one if his "War Eagle" friends. Thank you for visiting!!! 

This beautiful young lady is such a sweetheart!!! She and her coworker were do ready to have daddy back under their care. We love y'all!!! 

He loves his ice chips!

These two spoil him Rotten!!

December 2, 2012 - Reunions

Reunions

Families who live close together have the opportunity to see each other on a regular basis. Those who live miles, even states, apart, don't. My cousins were born and raised in Alabama ... Cousins on both sides of our family, actually. Bill and I grew up in Tennessee, Texas and back to Tennessee, so visiting with family wasn't always the easiest thing in the world to do. People die, others divorce, kids grow up and go off to school and begin their own lives. Before we know it, it's been decades since we've been in contact with our relatives. Thanks to Facebook, that has changed for our family.

I don't even remember when, but I located one of my cousins and sent him a friend request. I was thrilled to pieces when he accepted it and we started communicating. Back in September during a visit to Maryville, Conrad and I had to drive over to Memphis for a business meeting. The idea crossed my mind that perhaps we could plan to meet my cousin and his wife either on the way over there or on the way back. We worked it out to meet at a restaurant and ended up staying something like three hours catching up! That was an amazing experience and I wouldn't take anything in the world for it!

Well, today we got to share a similar experience with mom, dad, Bill and Christy. I cannot even begin to guess how long we spent together today, but the time spend is irreplaceable and priceless. We talked about things we did as kids ... Things my mom and his dad did when they were young ... We recreated family trees ... Dug up old skeletons, and shook out the cobwebs, and cleared the air on family matters. I'm not afraid to say this ... I cried. It was a very emotional time, and I'm so very glad we got to spend this time together. Thank you, Monroe and Kathy, for spending the day with us!!! We love you both dearly!!

We are already talking about future gatherings and finding time to meet their daughters. I'm hoping we can rent a cabin in the mountains or something and spend some quality time together.

Oh yeah ... This is supposed to be about dad, isn't it!?

Dad was quite alert today. His television was on and his blinds were open ... Quite an improvement over the last few days! His doctor said his lungs are clearing and his breathing has improved enough to be taken off the ventilator again, so at noon the process began. At 5:00 he was doing very well and continuing to breathe on his own. That's a good sign!

We are guessing he might be moved back into the oncology unit sometime tomorrow. We shall see. If I were a betting person, I'd bet he will be having radiation tomorrow, if they move him in time. As usual, I'd prefer to escort him down there so I can watch him like a hawk afterwards. I will be forever nervous about him being in the hallway unattended waiting to be transported back up to his room.

Dad is talking better. His coughs are strong. He's constantly wanting ice chips. He's watching us. He's smiling. He's staying awake longer. He's alert. Baby steps. That's what this is all about. We always want giant strides in progress, but the graph of progress in recovery is almost never a straight upwards diagonal line ... There will be ups and downs. We are hoping and praying for a lot more ups (progress) than downs.

My stay in Tennessee will soon be drawing to a close. I've been here for five weeks. I've worn the same two pairs of shoes every day. I've bought new tops and jackets because I wasn't able to pack everything I might need. I've only been to Knoxville twice during this entire trip. And, I can count on one hand how many times I have been with my friends. This has been a long, difficult road, and the end isn't anywhere in sight. Our family all knows this and we are more than willing to go through it together ... For and with dad.

I've not even gotten back to my home, my husband, my cats, and my California friends, but I'm already thinking about the next reunion with my family. Please keep us all in your prayers. Pray for strength and healing for my dad so that he will be greatly improved when I come back to Tennessee. Pray for focus and wisdom for the medical team to properly care for and treat dad. Pray for strength, courage, and patience for our family.

Love. Hope. Faith. Strength. Wisdom. Patience. Family. Passion. Compassion. That's really what life is all about.

Getting some attention from his nurses earlier today.

A great visit from my cousin, Monroe and his precious wife, Kathy.

Dad's view of family members today. My cousin, Monroe Jones and his precious wife, Kathy, drive over today for a visit. We are thinking the last time we all got together was back in 1979. We love you both!!!!!! 

December 1, 2012 - Rest

Rest

It's amazing what rest will do for the human body. Getting a good night's sleep is like hitting the 'reset' button in our bodies. Dad's doctor decided to put dad back on a ventilator in ICU to let the machine do the work for him so he could rest and build up much needed strength. He made the correct call.

Mom and I went in to see dad this morning. He was alert and animated and smiling. One of the nurses said he greeted her this morning and even asked her how she doing. We are taking this as a step in the right direction!

Dad wanted ice chips. That's the first time in three days he asked for them. I have no doubt his mouth was dry. The nurses had already been giving him some, but he was nowhere near done when we got there. Three cups. Three cups of ice chips is how many dad went through during our watch. Mom freaks out because he does swallow some of the water into his lungs, but he coughs it up, and that's a very good thing. His lungs are strong, as are his abdominal muscles, so I am hopeful this will help in his recovery.

Bill and Christy came up to visit, too. Christy joked with dad about his ice chips and he smiled. He smiled quite a bit this morning and looked at us in disbelief when we told him he had slept solid for over two days without any sedatives. We told him he had been through a rough week and that he's doing so much better now.

Dad needs the rest. He needs to get stronger. His body needs to recover. His lungs need to empty themselves of the pneumonia. He's on his way. By the end of the day he was getting tired and was more irritable. Our precious friend, Allicon, came to visit after her shift was over. She is such a sweet girl and dad LOVES visits from her. (Christy and I seriously want to adopt her!)

Today wasn't a day of positive progress in leaps and bounds, but we did see progress in baby steps. We will take it! We are hoping dad will be even better in the morning. The goal is to change out his current trach to a trach collar and reduce his oxygen again to ween him off the ventilator. If this is successful, he will likely go back into a room in the oncology unit to continue cancer treatments early this week.

Cancer drugs scare me. They are definitely on that big long list of things I know little or nothing about. The only experience I have ever had with chemo drugs is when my cat had leukemia and had treatments for six months. I learned a lot about the drugs during that time and was able to tell which ones worked and which ones didn't. That was back in 2000, and I'm sure things have changed drastically since then.

Dad's cancer is vastly different from my cats. With his, there is actually an area in the body that can be identified as cancerous ... His left vocal cord. Dad could actually talk a bit again today. That makes communicating so much easier for all involved. I hope he can continue to be audible because I am going back to California in a few days and I really want to be able to talk WITH him, instead of TO him on the telephone.

I got some rest last night. I actually slept till 9:45 this morning. I had strange dreams, but none were enough to keep me awake. I hope I can sleep tonight. Christy is not feeling well and really scared me earlier today. She has been resting this afternoon.

There is something else that might keep me from sleeping ... My cousin and his wife are driving over in the morning to see mom and dad. I haven't told mom and dad about the visit ... I thought a surprise might be awesome. It has been too many years since my parents have seen my cousin, and they haven't ever met his wife. Conrad and I got together with them back in September and I am extremely thankful to have been able to rekindle my relationship with my cousin, meet his wife, and introduce Conrad to them both! I cannot wait to see them both!

It's almost midnight. I hope my dad has been resting for hours and will continue to sleep until morning. I am heading to bed, too.

December 1, 2012 - Ice Chips

Somebody's enjoying some ice chips today! Dad was surprised when we told him he had been asleep (without sedation!!!) for over two days! We have been worried sick! Praying this is a step in the right direction.

Look at that smile!

Dad's oncology physicians assistant came by to check on him. Not sure yet if he will have targeted therapy this week. Taking this one day at a time ...

Mercer's Favorite Nurse. He asked for her no matter what part of the hospital he was in. She'd stop by to visit often!

November 30, 2012 - Roller Coaster

Roller coaster

You know how roller coasters have ups and downs and spins and turns and twists ... Well, today has definitely been a roller coaster ride. This entire journey has been one, but today has been its own special kind of crazy.

The nurses and doctors agree it's always busy here between Thanksgiving and Christmas, plus with it being a full moon ... Well, you can imagine!

Christy arrived at the hospital early this morning. We were all super worried about dad last night and we hardly slept. Christy's gut instinct was that she needed to check on him, so she got here early. It's a good thing she did.

Dad was worse. He was exhausted. He was retaining fluids. His breathing was shallow and labored. His doctor looked at his charts and looked him over and listened to his lungs. He ordered more X-rays. He immediately decided dad needed to be moved back to ICU and put on a ventilator again.

After much organizing and gathering and testing, they were ready to move dad. Bill, Christy and I took a different elevator and met dad and the team transporting him as they arrived. The three of us sat in the waiting room while they got dad settled, then went in to be with him.

Dad's room was sparse, but adequately sized. A nurse brought us three chairs, so the "Peanut Gallery" could once again sit at dad's feet. We decided to wait to tell mom that dad had been moved because she was going to have her hair done and we all agreed she deserved to have a at least a little pleasure in her day. Besides, it wasn't a critical situation like it was Monday afternoon.

Some friends of mom and dad's showed up to see him, but were surprised when he wasn't in his room on the 5th floor. They went down tot he waiting room at ICU and Christy went out to talk to them and fill them in on what all had gone on. The last time they had been there to visit was when the rapid response was called on Monday. They are of the mindset that perhaps they shouldn't visit because every time they do, some emergency happens! Bless their hearts!!

Throughout the day dad's wonderful nurse came in to check on him, administer medications, suction his lungs, and do whatever needed to be done. The ladies from Respiratory Therapy came by frequently, as well. I had never ever seen ICU as busy as it was today. Every nurse seemed to be on the move all day long. I've also never seen as many doctors in there at one time!

We met the lung doctor who had just replaced dad's trach so they could add the ventilator equipment to it. He had recently been equipped with a different type, but nobody expected he'd have to go back on the vent. Regardless, it was a necessity, and he's breathing VIA the machine and resting his exhausted body, so now we are hoping he'll be on the rapid road to recovery.

His condition and frame of mind is quite different from what it was as recent as last Sunday. I wish like everything he had not aspirated on Monday. If that hadn't happened, he'd be light years ahead of where he is now. However, had Christy and I not been there to get help for him, he'd likely not have even made it through the day. I'd give my eye teeth to do that day over knowing what we know now.

We can't undo the past. We can learn from it, though. Yes ... Today has been a roller coaster ride. Not the most fun one, I assure you. Stress levels have been elevated. Moods have been low. Emotions have run wild. Imaginations have run amok. Hopes and dreams have shattered, only to be picked up and pieced back together with tape. Our family is exhausted. We are scared. We are hopeful. We have faith.

Faith in God above to do what's needed and to help understand the path we are all being led down. Faith in the doctors and nurses to have the wisdom, the speed, and the focus to make the best decisions. Faith in each other to be there for support, no matter what.

November 29, 2012 - Breathe

Breathe

The human body requires oxygen to survive. Too much oxygen can be as bad as not enough, so there's a balance that sustains life. Air is 20.9% oxygen, 79% nitrogen, and 1.1% other gasses. When we breathe, we only use part of the oxygen in the air? Oxygen is used in the healing process, so some parts of hospitals actually have as much as 40% oxygen flowing through them, and maybe even more.

I woke up early this morning, even though I needed sleep. I tried to go back to sleep, but never did. That's okay because someone called from the radiation department at 8:00 to let me know they'd be taking dad down for his treatment at 8:30. I quickly dressed and drove over to the hospital to be with dad for his treatment, as promised. When I arrived, he was still quite asleep. The nurses were about to check stats and clean him up, but I told them about my call from radiation, so they prepped him for that instead. All went well. No drama, no events. Just a quick trip down, radiation, and a quick trip back up to his room.

There were several nursing students from Lincoln Memorial University there today. One girl named Sarah was doing a lot of hands-on and the other two were basically watching. Christy and I shared a lot about our family's journey with Sarah. She seemed very eager to learn more. She will be a great nurse.

Dad was not very alert today. Even less so than yesterday. Christy and I were very concerned about him. After talking to several doctors and nurses we felt more comfortable with the situation, although we don't like it. We want him well, dang it!!

Dad has aspiration pneumonia. That's from Monday's awful experience. He is quite ill. He won't be having any more of his chemo treatments until he is better. We don't yet know about radiation. I suppose I will know if I get a phone call in the morning!

Most of the day I sat in a chair at the foot of daddy's bed. I like that chair because he can easily see me when he wakes up and looks around. I like that bed because I can easily see his chest rise and fall, so I can also see how easy or how labored his breathing is. Seeing his chest rise and fall gives me great comfort.

Tomorrow is yet another day. We were thinking he might be moved to Asbury fairly soon, but a doctor told mom they wouldn't move him until he has had two or three good days in a row. That was a relief, but also a concern. We want him to have the best possible care available, but we want him to start therapy as soon as possible, since every day in bed equates to three days of therapy needed.

So now we wait. Again. We watch him breathe. We listen to him breathe. We pray that his lungs clear quickly and that he feels much better soon. We pray for wise decisions from the doctors. We pray for strength. We pray for patience. We pray for time. We pray for healing. We pray for dad to be cancer-free as soon as possible.